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Writer's pictureAmy Clark

Letting Go of Anger and Resentment to Find Forgiveness

Updated: Jan 10, 2020


If you’ve ever felt anger or resentment, you know how toxic these emotions can be and how they are held them within our bodies. For some, staying angry is an emotion that feels normal, comfortable, or like a lifeline.

Holding on to anger leads to resentment—an emotion that you can feel “gestating” within. It tears up your gut.

“What we don’t realize is that holding onto resentment is like holding onto your breath. You’ll soon start to suffocate.” Deepak Chopra

“Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die.” Malachy McCourt

So how do we let go of these emotions? First, look your negative emotions in the eye and take stock of what your body is signaling to you. Anger can be manifested in physical ailments like upset stomachs, headaches and muscle tightness.

Consider what it will take to get you to let go of these harmful feelings.

Be willing to open up the old wounds that trigger these emotions. Encourage yourself to let go and forgive.

What is the difference between forgiveness and letting go?

Louise Hay writes:

‘You can never be free of bitterness as long as you continue to think unforgiving thoughts. How can you be happy in this moment if you continue to choose to be angry and resentful? Thoughts of bitterness can’t create joy. No matter how justified you feel you are, no matter what “they” did, if you insist on holding on to the past, then you will never be free. Forgiving yourself and others will release you from the prison of the past.’

This week’s Circle shared some techniques for releasing anger and resentment, and finding forgiveness:

  • Getting out of your mind and starting to listen to your body

  • Being aware of, and facing your emotions, helps to create a shift

  • Staying in the present moment and reminding ourselves how perfect it is

  • Meditating and breathing

  • Practicing and visualizing gratitude and appreciation

  • Finding compassion in understanding the source of the emotions

  • Thinking better feeling thoughts to shift your vibration

  • Turning to humor

  • Practicing saying “I’m sorry”

  • Remember the phrase coined by --“Thinking from the end” see your body free of the emotions as if it’s already done.

  • Imagine how good your body would feel without these emotions as advised by and revel in those feelings

In Caroline Myss writes:

“Change your vocabulary. Specifically, give up the use of the following terms and all that they imply: blame, deserve, guilt, fair, fault. If you cut those five words from your vocabulary, both in your private thoughts and in your communication with others, you will notice almost immediately that it is far more difficult to fall into negative emotional patterns. You will also discover how habitual those patterns had become.

“To live in the present, the practice of forgiveness is essential. Without forgiveness, you remain anchored in your past, forever in emotional debt.”

Recommended Reading: “The Surrender Experiment” by Michael Singer

Comfortable With Uncertainty” by Pema Chodrun

When Things Fall Apart” by Pema Chodrun

Have you had successes releasing anger and resentment and being able to forgive?

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