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Writer's pictureAmy Clark

On Connecting to Self-Love

Updated: Jan 10, 2020


We all know that absolutely nothing surpasses LOVE in this world--love of self, family, community, a higher power etc. Feeling loved and giving love is where it's at! As the late John Lennon wrote--Love is all there is!

But in today's seemingly chaotic world, feelings of "love", let alone" self-love", are elusive and farther away than ever from our grasps. If you watch the news and follow social media, we're bombarded with an endless stream of negativity and hatred. That outside noise and stress appears to have a significant influence on all of us. To add insult to injury, oftentimes the expectations from our families, our societies, our religions and our cultures keep us from connecting and learning to love and listen to our inner wisdom.

For this blogger, it seems such a sad conundrum. Everyone wants to feel love and give love, yet we're consistently separated from it. Basking in loving, good, joyous, happy, life giving feelings is a human right, not a luxury.

It's obvious now more than ever this has got to change! THE WORLD NEEDS LOVE!! But how can we overcome the outside pressures and get back to the basics of learning to tap into our own positive, loving inner voices and hearts so we can return to spreading the abundance of love as a path to healing?

We asked these hard questions to the ladies in our Circles this month;

* Do you love yourself? Do you trust you inner voice?

* What stands in the way of connecting with your inner voice and wisdom of self-love?

* How can you teach yourself to be love and heart-centered?

Posing these questions caused lots of squirming among the ladies but following a robust discussion, they shared these thoughts:

* Self-love is not really taught in our culture. Giving and receiving love seem to be the focus. We can feel loved by our families and those outside our inner circles, but unless we trust and connect with the sentiment, it can be hard to truly believe and integrate

* Separating or de-sensitizing from negative messaging when we're very young can really get in the way- of finding self-love-"you're too fat, you're not smart enough, you're not good enough, you'll never be successful if you don't do as I say......." We often go to battle with these early messages in our memories. If we're lucky the dust settles and the path to self-love is clear

* Many of us don't know how to connect with our inner voices and our spirits--the non-physical parts of ourselves, which can lead us to self-love and tapping into our innate wisdom

* We often lose ourselves and true identities to labels and roles we take on

* We confuse judgment with love

* We struggle with forgiveness which can create barriers to loving ourselves

* We spend too much time focusing on our weaknesses rather than our strengths -(The Law of Attraction--you create what you focus upon and think about)

* We buy into societies' subtle messages that fitting in and following rules created outside ourselves is the way to find love

* The core principles of many religions can keep us from loving ourselves as they define what is and is not acceptable.

The ladies made the following suggestions:

* Loving yourself means living authentically and with your purpose

* Be mindful of the words and actions you ascribe to yourself--your body listens!

* Start and end each day meditating and focusing on self-gratitude and appreciation.

*Minimize your time spent on social media and watching the news

*Set aside time for yourself to connect with your inner wisdom--it won't lead you astray! It takes time, strength and courage! You've got it! Find it!

* Trust yourself and your inner voice

* Be a leader and not a follower where your life is concerned-let your inner wisdom be your guide

* Face the dark sides of yourself so you can illuminate and shine your light of love

* Remind yourselves that every minute of every day you can make your own choices and choose love

* Remember it's our innate right and legacy on this earth to feel love, to give and spread love. With love and connection in our hearts, we can transform the world!

What do you think? Do you love yourself? Could you sit down and create a list of what you love in the present moment? Do you trust your inner guidance system?Are you strong enough to turn down the outside noise? We'd like to hear from you below and for you to share.

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